Michelle Visage Is Not-So-Secretly the Best TV Host
For a moment I am petrified, convinced that Michelle Visage is about to run up on me.
She’s asked me a question no entertainment journalist ever wants to hear in an interview: “I have an article on my phone, and I’m wondering if you wrote it.” She pauses,. “No, it’s not a bad thing, it was a good thing. It was, ‘Michelle Visage is quite possibly the best living talk show host,’ or something.”
The article which covers Visage’s lockdown-inspired talk show How’s Your Head Hun?, reads, in part: “Beyond the glamorized portrait she puts out into the drag world, there is an unmistakable depth to Visage, with deeply heartfelt convictions about womanhood, love, motherhood, and family-making. […]. I want more Michelle Visage. Television needs more Michelle Visage.”
She continues now: “I’m going to tell you this, which will make me emotional: that article meant so much to me, because you don’t understand how long I have been trying to prove to the world that I am worthy. That I am more than that. I am so sick of being shoved into one box. It was a moment for me that made me so proud. Thank you for seeing me as something other than what people want to put me in a corner. To do that meant so much to me, because my dream is to have my own talk show, that’s my dream.”
That wish was granted for both of us, in part, seeing as Visage is the host of the new Botched spinoff series, Botched Presents: Plastic Surgery Rewind. Over the season, various celebrities with various plastic surgery procedures will face their desires to reverse — or keep the same — those same procedures. The series calls to mind The Swan, an infamous plastic surgery show from the dark days of the aughts.
Visage laughs at this.The Swan is her “favorite TV show of all time. Sorry, it’s absolutely horrific what it stands for, but it was mesmerizing.” But having seen the first few episodes, those fears were abated, instead replaced by genuine shock at how far the medium has come in the last 20 years. As part of the process for the celebrities that go through the “Rewind Retreat,” each episode includes challenges and sessions with Dr. Spirit, a psychotherapist tasked with delving into the how and why behind the celebs’ surgical desires.
Visage says it was “so important” for therapy to integrate in the format of the show. “There’s a reason why we got the surgery in the first place, right?” she tells PAPER. “I can use myself as an example to demonstrate: the same issues that I had with my flat chest at 21 are going to be there at 55 when I take my implants out. That’s just the truth.”
Among guests in the retreat are The Real Housewives of Atlanta OG Kim Zolciak and daughter Brielle Biermann, 90 Day Fiancé star Larissa Dos Santos Lima and even Aubrey O’Day. The former Danity Kane member learns of Diddy’s arrest over the course of production; Visage says it was a “gift” to be a “shoulder for her and a sounding board for her.” They share a bond as two women who’ve been through the recording industry and reality television gauntlet. Visage agrees, saying: “We have a kinship because I went through the same machine. Mine was just earlier. Mine was in 1989 and 1990 with C&C Music Factory, and having gone through a production deal and that kind of a machine, I know what it feels like — I know what it feels like to feel disposable and to feel like we don’t really matter, replaceable, you name it.”
This motherly sentiment is something that comes up often in my conversations with drag queens who’ve been through the RuPaul’s Drag Race pageant circuit, presided over in part by Visage. While RuPaul is “mother” in a more literal sense, it’s Visage who exudes an immediacy and warmth with past contestants like Jinkx Monsoon, who she described in June as one of her children. “What I’m realizing is I’m not sure I really got the parenting that I deserved as an adopted kid,” Visage says.“So I am now able to be the mother to my inner child that I was never really able to have in my life.” Through the work, she found that “being able to do that for these kids, or for any queer kid that feels like they were never seen by their mother, or had that motherly love to protect them or guide them or just tell them that they matter, if I can give that to somebody, then that’s my reason for being.”
For more from PAPER’s interview with Michelle Visage, continue reading below.
There is a really powerful moment in episode two, where you sit and you take your make-up off with the celebrities, and you kind of challenge them to do the same. It was interesting to see you just go right into it with them and be like, I’m in this experience with you.
It was the very beginning, they were still kind of feeling me out. They might have known who I was, but they’ve never spent time with me. They don’t know how I am or who I am. And I really wanted to make everybody feel loved and welcomed as the host, you know? Dr. Spirit has that calming, soothing way about her, but that’s not my gig. I’m not a therapist. So as the host, I wanted them to know that I was there with them and in a sisterhood with all of them. Spirit asked me to do it and I said absolutely. I’m sure my makeup artist wasn’t so happy, that all his hard work was taken off on TV.
It read like you got emotional afterwards, asking them to participate, and telling them that you see them as beautiful and who they really are. Talk me through that reaction in the moment.
People that have been through the machine of Hollywood have one certain way of thinking they need to be, and they’re afraid to appear any other way. And now that I am a certain age, I realize, “Oh, you’ll get the full me in every way that I deliver myself.” So if I’m there with no makeup, or if I’m in sweatpants with a bun on my head, you’re still getting the full me. It’s us. We are our own worst enemy and our own worst critics. So I was sitting there looking at all these beautiful people who had tons of makeup on, the hair, the outfits, the heels, the lashes, you name it. And I know that deep inside there’s insecurities just like me, just like everybody else.
So I thought, listen, if I go first and I remove this exterior, and I expose myself, maybe they will, What made me emotional — spoiler alert — every single one of them did it. I didn’t expect any, and every single one did. And the fact that Aubrey did it first, even, that was mind-blowing to me. She’s as much of a drag queen as I am. So it was really, really emotional to see these beautiful people be willing to shed that on TV. It’s a big deal. It doesn’t seem like it, because, I mean, there’s people out there on the front lines of war. I’m not comparing it, but for these people to be that kind of vulnerable on television is a big risk.
I have to say, you and Aubrey O’Day have one of my favorite Drag Race moments.
Directing the perfume videos!
Yes, in season five! She described Alyssa as looking like a serial killer, and there’s that image of you two watching the commercials. It’s been meme-d heavily over the years.
[Laughs] That’s accurate.
What was it like reuniting with Aubrey? You haven’t worked together since, from what I could tell.
No, we haven’t worked together since. I’ve seen her here and there. But what was a gift for me, was seeing how excited she was to see that it was me standing there when she got out of the car. I could automatically, instantly see her guard get let down, and she felt protected and she felt safe. It was wonderful that I could provide that for her, because she struggles. She doesn’t have a lot of people around her that she trusts or that are there for her in that kind of context. So that was really special to be able to be by her side through all of this, because as the show goes on, she finds out that Diddy had been arrested. It all unfolds in real-time on this show. So being able to be a shoulder for her and a sounding board for her was a gift.
I’ve covered what she and Dawn Richard have gone through, just with Making the Band and their experiences in Danity Kane, for what feels like a lot of my career now. The machine that they came through, you can see the effects that it might have had on them, either their sense of self or their sense of self worth. Did you see that unravel a little bit over the course of the show?
Yeah. And you know what, Joan, we have a kinship because I went through the same machine. Mine was just earlier. Mine was in 1989 and 1990 with C&C Music Factory, and having gone through a production deal and that kind of a machine, I know what it feels like. I know what it feels like to feel disposable and to feel like we don’t really matter, replaceable, you name it. I had a kind of kinship with her, so it touched at my heartstrings even more than maybe the average person. And when you watch it, you realize that this kid has been through a lot of shit, so it’s very interesting, and I hope she gets the peace that she deserves at some point, and she will. I know she will.
I will be totally honest: I was hesitant when I first heard about it. You hear “reversing plastic surgery” and feel hesitant! There’s this culture of surgery that rose in the 2010s and intensified in the early 2020s, and now celebrities are saying they’ve gone too far, or led astray. What do you think has contributed to that, as things regress, or the pendulum goes the other way?
I wish I had a definitive answer, Joan, but the reality is this: this generation is the generation of social media. We are being fed lies, and curated lies at that. This era of transparency, with celebrities being transparent about their plastic surgeries, but you and I both know this is only selective transparency. They’re telling you some of what they have done because they don’t want to admit to everything they’ve had done.
I’ve been accused of having surgery my whole career! The only surgery I have ever had, besides a torn meniscus on my knee, and Cesareans, is three boob jobs and then the final explant. So I have never had any plastic surgery. However, if I had grown up with social media — I got my boobs done when I was 21— if I had seen what I see now, chances are I would have been lining up, because my insecurities are there. They’ve always been there. I’m an adopted kid who didn’t fit in. I never felt like I belonged anywhere. So of course, if I’m going to see these gorgeous people on Instagram who are not real, I am going to be like, “Well, I want to look like that.”
This is why we’re a society, a nation, of doppelgangers. Everybody looks the same, nobody looks individual anymore. And listen, I am not poo-pooing plastic surgery. I am all for it. I’m absolutely gonna have a neck lift at some point in my career. And if it makes you feel better, do it. It’s more about transparency. Know what you’re putting into your body, know what you’re doing. Because, like you just said, Joan, plastic surgery regret is a real thing for me. I didn’t necessarily regret it, so I’m not going to rewrite my story. I got sick from my breast implants. I had breast implant illness, but as I took them out and had to deal with the fact that I was going to be extremely flat tested, there was mental work to do on myself there, because I didn’t accept myself before.
And I’m so glad you brought that up about the show. Because the title says Botched Presents, people may think it’s going to be one thing, but it’s not. None of these surgeries are botched. These are just people that are from different walks and in different chapters of their lives. They’re ready to say thank you and start the next chapter. These surgeries have served them well, but now they’re mothers, or they’re going on to a different part of their career, and they are done with it, and it’s really empowering. This show has so much heart that I don’t think people would expect.
When I first heard it, you know, I immediately thought of The Swan.
My favorite TV show of all time. Sorry, it’s absolutely horrific what it stands for, but it was mesmerizing.
It shows that reality TV has evolved so much that ten, fifteen years ago, that was the standard for the kind of show this would be. And now we have a show where therapy is part of the process. Talk me through what it was like to also witness the therapy side of it.
It was so important for it to be there, because there’s a reason why we got the surgery in the first place, right? I can use myself as an example to demonstrate: the same issues that I had with my flat chest at 21 are going to be there at 55 when I take my implants out. That’s just the truth. It’s like people getting weight loss surgery or taking GLP-1s. If you’re not doing the mental work, the larger person is going to still live within you. So you have to do the therapeutic work that goes along with it, or else you’re still going to be stuck with the emotions that you had before surgery. So therapy was so very important for this to work the right way, because people had to understand, or at least begin to understand, why they were there in the first place. And that was super important. And Dr. Spirit was the right one to do it.
You’ve had a second career start over the last decade in the U.K., which is a culture that’s way more receptive still to shows like The RuPaul Show, just with variety shows and stuff like that. Talk to me about what you love working over there!
Well, they’re way more receptive to me, Joan, I have my own identity over there, and I find it very difficult to break free here. They’ll always see me as the judge on RuPaul’s Drag Race, and it’s like… guys! Before Drag Race, I was in a pop group, I had radio, and on and on. The point is, they’re way more receptive to things that are not the norm over there. They are ludicrous, they are ridiculous, they understand eccentricity and they applaud it. They like anything that’s not ordinary.
Now, I can’t speak for everybody, but I know that when I go there, I’m loved and welcomed and wanted. I feel like I am still, at 56 years old, having to prove myself here. I’m going, guys, can you just let me audition? I’ll show you what I can do! I loved that they called me to host this show. It’s such an honor to be able to show that they believed in me. Of course the showrunner is a Brit, and he knows what I can do! That’s the irony of it.
There’s one other thing I wanted to ask: I was listening to you talk about what you were going to be seen as after your explant, and the fears of removing or reversing plastic surgery. As a viewer, I won’t speak for you, but there’s been an image or stylistic evolution for you over the last few years, and you really have come into yourself. Do you feel like that was part of it, going through this process of therapy and the explant and self-discovery?
Such a great question. For me, I was stifled by these giant breasts, and I was 55 pounds heavier. Now, I have an autoimmune which you know, from watching Explant, and I started getting panic attacks again. When we were in lockdown in New Zealand, they came back, and I was like, I am done. I am not playing this game anymore. I am getting off this roller coaster.
I was told by one of my doctors to try the autoimmune protocol, food wise. And I had tried three or four different times, but I had been vegan for so long that I was like, I’m not going to do this. I’m not going to introduce animal products. And I had no choice, because with veganism, it was lovely, and I was doing great for a long time, but my blood work took a turn — and I ate very well. I was a soy free, gluten free vegan, because I’m celiac as well, and everything started to turn. Now, it doesn’t work for everybody, long term for me, short term, it worked great. So then I started incorporating fish. And I changed my diet without telling anybody, and I started working out for five minutes a day.
Joan, I started in a hotel room on a towel, yoga breathing. And then from there I I found “Yoga with Cassandra” on YouTube for free. And I started doing her stuff. And then I bought two $10 Tracy Anderson courses with three pound weights. Then I got a trainer, and I started going to the gym quietly, and it took a long time to get it off. But see, the thing is, I film Drag Race, and you see it a year later, so in real time when I’m talking about it, I’m 40 pounds lighter at this point. So everybody’s going: “Ozempic! You have ozempic face!” And I’m like, No, guys, I have thyroid disease! If I could do Ozempic, I would absolutely tell you. I’m telling you now, Joan, I one hundred percent would do it, I would do it. I would have no problem talking about it, but because of the thyroid, I won’t. I’m too scared to take that risk, so I don’t do it.
So to answer your question, I had designers that wouldn’t design, they wouldn’t even answer my emails, mostly because I was plus size, but also maybe they didn’t like me. I mean, they didn’t know me, but nobody would answer emails. So I thought, “Okay, I’m going to start, you know, dealing with my stylist.” He dressed me when I was a size 14, and he dresses me when I’m a 6. And we did the best that we could. It’s better now, but like, four or five years ago, plus size outfits were not as fashionable and as prolific as they are now. There’s tons of them, much more now, and many more options. You have gorgeous designers like Christian Siriano, who, by the way, I’ve reached out to 100 times. I would love to wear his clothes.
That’s the headline: “Christian Siriano, please respond to Michelle’s emails.”
I would love to wear Christian Siriano and have him make something for me. But the point is, nobody wanted to dress me. So I got into the shape that I want. I got really involved in longevity too, and biohacking. I really, really want to live to 120 in the best shape of my life. And I’m also menopausal, so they’re telling me that I can’t build muscle, and that I have to deal with the fat that I have, and I said, “No, I’m going to prove you wrong. I’m going to do this my way.” So I picked up heavy weights, and I weight trained six days a week. And now, because of that, and also being flatter, I’m able to wear more clothing, because it is very restrictive when you have ginormous tints. And that’s a fact, so I’m glad you fat transferred and didn’t get ginormous tits.
We’re out of time, but Michelle, I’m so glad you brought up that article I wrote. I’d forgotten about that.
You don’t understand, it was quiet pride. I showed my husband. It was a moment, and I even think I posted it on my Instagram stories. It was just a moment of feeling validated. I’ve been working since I’m 19 in this industry: radio, television, music, and to have somebody say that, which is my ultimate dream! It’s very hard to break into that, and it just… you made my life. You really did. So thank you.
Botched Presents: Plastic Surgery Rewind airs Wednesdays at 10pm on E!.
Photos courtesy of NBCUniversal
